Thursday, May 17, 2012

Indian Fights, Bathroom Blowjobs, and Me: Ladies and Gentlemen, The Squire Lounge.

Boy where to begin. Been out of the restaurant game for little over year, but I got shit canned from my radio gig for reasons still unclear to me.  If you started firing people for being assholes on the air, rather than saying asshole mind you, there'd be a lot of dead air.  I can certainly get into why radio is a decaying mess of a business filled with lots of meatheads whose shit smells rosy at all times, but this isn't about me. Smash cut to March.

I need a job ASAP and a downtrodden search ensues.  Its pretty dry out there for someone whose only job skills are expertise in sports and booze.  Could have found product spokesman work again.  I could've been some kind of company mascot for a tech firm up in Broomfield.  I applied for god knows how many shitty radio jobs that are out there in the United States in plenty of towns I would eventually loathe if I decided to have to another go of it. Can't help that I enjoy the variety-filled, yet simple tranquility of life in Denver. Meanwhile I had quietly built up several years of solid experience managing a bar and restaurant and the opportunity came along. Never before had I been offered a job during the interview, but the uncommon marks this place. So it is that I find myself the brand new big swinging dick of The Squire Lounge. perhaps the most venerable of places on seedy Colfax Avenue, and trust me the 3200 block of Colfax this ain't.

Now to why I'm here putting it all into the majesty or words. I am for transparency.  Its worked for the Broncos as soon as Elway hopped on the old twitter machine. I want to let people know the Squire is open for business.  I want you to know that the Squire crowd at night is a lot different than the Squire crowd during the days.  Really when you get down to it, if you go on Colfax in Denver, end to end, soup to nuts, the crowd is pretty much the same. We get the same kind of people who appreciate a diamond in the rough.  So while solid places like Encore fall by the wayside, we'll be here.  And I want customers to be privy to some of the cool stuff I will attempt to bring about in order to participate in the Colfax Renaissance. Like craft beer?  We'll be doing more of that.  Haven't been back to Comedy Night in a while? The guys and girls doing it every Tuesday are absolutely bringing the comedy meat.  And we're actually starting it before Wednesday now if you have shit to do in the morning.  Stay tuned.

And the stories I could tell after a mere 8 weeks.   There's the time two mulletted Native American women got into a mini-brouhaha in our ladies room.  It was the first time I had to mop up blood here, luckily just a few splotches on the floor.  Of course it started the way these things always start with our day drinkers.  The heavier set of the two Rolling Rock drinkers was extolling the merits of Linger as the best restaurant in Denver, while the other was backing a more traditional setting like the Brown Palace.  Could happen to any of us.  And if you're a classy lady using Cinco De Mayo as an excuse to make out with about three different guys at the bar, have at it.  The entertainment she provided not only at the bar, but as she sat on the men's toilet sucking down one guy's churro will not soon be forgotten.

So thanks to the good people at colfaxavenue.org for allowing me a semi-regular forum to endorse the Squire Lounge.  Some of the guys behind it like Jonny Barber came in and put on a helluva musical performance at our place as part of the Root 40 Music Fest.  You can certainly expect a return engagement at our little house of the peculiar. Judging by the site's penchant for illustrating Colfax weirdness, I think we'll be right at home.  


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